2 steps forward...3 steps back!

We have had some challenging days. Carson's meltdowns have become more regular and more intense. We never know what might set him off. Sometimes it feels like walking on eggshells because we just never know what will upset him. He was eating popcorn tonight and his bowl was almost empty and I went to refill it abs he got so upset. He knocked the bag of popcorn out of my hand, threw his bowl on the floor and started flailing his arms and legs and screaming. I felt awful and couldn't calm him down. Episodes like this have been occurring more and more. I expected his fits would get worse the older he got but these are far worse than I ever imagined. He is so strong that I can hardly contain him. I worry that the older and stronger he gets I will have no control over him at all. We have to take this one day at a time and remember as stressful as it can get for us it has to be frightening to him when he loses control. He has come a long way and we can't let setbacks discourage us. He is a fighter and he will overcome this!!!

Celebrating the 4th of July

We  had a GREAT 4th! We went to the lake and swam all day. They had live music and food at the beach and an awesome firework show. The kids had so much fun. Carson was in the water for 3hrs straight!!! He LOVES water!!!

Regression

Carson has been doing so well the past year or so but the past few weeks he is starting to slip back into his old ways. We weren't really sure if the GFCF diet was helping him so we have been giving him things with gluten and dairy in them for about 3 weeks and I think that is why he has been acting this way. Now for sure we know that the diet does work. Not many doctors believe in the diet and even Carson's teacher at school says she doesnt think it has any benefits. Well I know first hand that it DOES work!!! We have had him back on it strictly now for a week and he is already sleeping better and having less tantrums. This diet does indeed work!!!

Last week was Carson's summer break and we had such a great week. We went to the water park, the movies to see Madagascar 3, Carson's first movie. We went to the lake and we went to DC and Maryland to visit family. Carson had a great week but had to go back to school today. A lot of times Carson is very detached to me and that is so hard. When he is home with me for breaks he gets to where he wants me with him a lot and that makes me feel so good. Today when I dropped him off at school he didnt want me to leave. It made me so sad but at the same time it made me feel really really good. Its so sad when your own child pushes you away and doesnt really want anything to do with you. I think its getting much better.

June 2012 Update

Carson is doing GREAT!!! Still no words but his progress is amazing. I pray everyday that he will one day talk. I dont want this for me but for him because I know it will make life much easier for him. He is able to do a 48 piece puzzle by himself but can't utter a single word. It's so confusing sometimes. I know his brain is wired different and nobody will ever completely understand autism but it still baffles me everyday. If I could have one wish my wish would be for my son to talk and to be able to have a conversation with him. I would love for him to come home from school one day and tell me about his day. I'm not giving up hope that one day this WILL happen.

Carson continues to meet his goals every quarter and his teachers tell us he is doing so well. We have had his IEP meeting for next years school year and set his goals. Next fall he is supposed to start kindergarten but I know that wont happen. He will most likely never go to a regular school but that is more than ok with me. I want him in a place where he can advance and where I know he wont be bullied. I just want the best for him and I want to do anything and everything I can to make sure that happens and to make sure he has a successful and happy future. Everything I do is for Carson. Its so true that when you have a child with special needs that the little things really are the big things. Getting a smile and eye contact from his makes my heart soar. That's an amazing feeling coming from an autistic child!!!

I am an Autism Strong Mom

Autism Quote

If he falls to the floor, kicking and screaming, because there’s no chicken nuggets, it’s just his way of coping. Be patient, you’ll get your turn to order.

If she bumps her head and starts to hit herself in the face, don’t stare, it’s her frustration. Mom will handle it, she see’s it everyday.

If dad is cutting his child’s food, he’s not treating him like baby. He just doesn’t want his son to c...hoke.

If she ignores your child on the playground, she’s not a brat. She’s just not good at social interaction. She would love to play with your child, she just doesn’t know how.

He may be to big to sit in the shopping cart, no, he’s not lazy. He wants to run around, but his mom needs to shop. She’s not up for chasing him today.

If she has to be carried out screaming, it’s probably because of a meltdown. Be helpful, open the door. Don’t just stare or whisper. No, it’s not because she didn’t get the toy she wanted. If it were only that simple.

Don’t talk to her like a child, unless she is one. Don’t yell, she’s not deaf. She may not talk, but she can understand.

No, it’s not bad parenting. Discipline won’t help.

This is autism, it’s his life. Don’t judge him, he’s not judging you. ♥

By Tina Moreland

Carson's Smile

I love love love when Carson makes eye contact and smiles! I love these moments. They make my heart sing!