Happy Birthday Carson!

4 years ago today I became a mother. I had no idea at the time how much love my heart could hold. This little boy has touched so many lives. I love him sooo much!!! Happy 4th Birthday buddy xoxo

Autism can change the world...

"If my child having Autism can change me for the better, it can change you as well. And if Autism can change you, it can change the world"
-Stewart Duncan

Swinging and Spinning

We brought Carson to this little park by our house. There is just a slide and a tire swing. Carson loves to swing and even more than that he loves tire swings. I noticed the entire time he was on the swing he was so attentive. Every time I said his name he responded and made eye contact! He was so calm and happy on the swing.

The Little Things

A quote I love and can relate to

4 already?

Carson will be 4 in 10 days!!! I can't believe it! It seems like we just brought him home from the hospital! The last 4 years have been the most fulfilling but challenging years of my life! I never would have thought MY child would have autism but he does. It's 1 in 88 and he is the 1! Autism has taught me to appreciate the little things in life and not take those things for granted. 4 years ago I was pregnant and excitedly waiting the arrival of my first child. When I thought of the little boy I hadn't met yet I pictured him going to football games with his daddy and being mommy's little boy. I never imagined him with autism. That doesn't mean our dreams for him can't one day happen but it just means we will have to work a little harder to get there. 4 years ago autism never crossed my mind but 4 years later it is very close to my heart. However Carson is so much more than autism. Autism is just a characteristic like blue eyes. It's apart of who he is but it doesn't define him. Sometimes I have to remind myself of this. He is still the same little boy we brought home 4 years ago. Our bundle of joy!!!

An angel for Carson

This little girl is amazing. She brings out something in Carson that nobody else can. Carson doesnt interact with other children EVER! Aryn and Carson have known each other their whole lives and anytime they are together Carson smiles so much and will grab her hand and play with her. Its amazing! When they are together its easy to forget that Carson has autism beause its almost like its erased when he is with Aryn. He is a happy playful little boy full of smiles and laughter. Its just so amazing to see!!! Aryn is an angel sent from God to help Carson!!!

Repeat after me; it's not my fault my child has autism

I cant wait to read this book

That’s the first line of our book, Navigating Autism. Someone asked me recently why we chose that as our opening line, so here’s the explanation. When we stated dealing with this seven years ago, we were filled with fear, anger, frustration and guilt. “How could this happen to me?” “What did I do to deserve this?” “This isn’t fair, why can’t I ever seem to catch a break?” I, I, I, me, me, me. Sounds pretty selfish huh? Looking back, I feel like, “Wow – what was I thinking?” But when you’re in the middle of it, it’s hard to see the forest for the trees. It’s not an excuse, just an explanation. Both of us went through a rough time after we heard the diagnosis. Here’s the painful truth, this didn’t happen to me, it happened to my children. Their struggles, triumphs or failures belong to them alone – not me. Yes, I will contribute to and share in their successes and disappointments, but as a parent just like any other. When I started to think about it that way, my whole perspective began to change. All that frustration and anger became determination. I stopped focusing on my problems and put my focus where it needed to be, on my kids. I quickly started to recognize problems and even better, forming solutions. Yes, at first, a lot of those solutions didn’t work, but at least I was looking in the right direction. As a parent, I can tell you, I went through a rough time afafter I heard the diagnosis. You have to get past your own problems so you can help your child.

Okay, enough doom and gloom, here’s the silver lining that I’ve discovered. I am a much better parent because of autism. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I’m perfect but I can say that I am much closer to being the “Dad” I want to be. I work in Hollywood which is… let’s see, what’s the nice way to put this, the most shallow, self centered, self serving, egotistical industry on the face of the planet. Yeah that’s the nice way to say it. My kids saved me from that. I am involved in their lives. I know what they like to do, I play games with them and every time I come home after being gone, they are excited to see me. Let me tell you, nothing tops that.